Enough silence.
Disclaimer: I am sick (literally, a cold) and find myself in bed hungry but no taste for anything. There will be spelling errors. Carry on.
Hi. For a month I worked my butt off in a routine and schedule and diet. I found some results, but really it wasn’t a number game for me. It was a ‘wow I feel amazing’ game. Then something happened inside my heart and I was broken. I didn’t want to blog about it, or make a video. Maybe I should have? The thing is… I guess I wasn’t ready to share my darkness. The road block that hit me in the chest; hard.
Where do I really start from there? here?
First - I miss having a routine work out. I’ve spent the last few weeks doing a lot of outside work (landscaping the house!) and it has felt great. I’ve been surrounded by a lot of great fun. However, I really need to be more physical. I’ve gone on a few lengthy walks here and there, but this should be routine right now. Changing that Tuesday. Getting back in the game. I miss feeling that work out high!
Next - I have to say this because it is on my mind. It has been on my mind for the past few months, and slowly it has festered. I cannot deal with people who talk the talk but do not walk the walk. I cannot deal with the ‘yay! look what I’ve done!’ and they haven’t really done it, at all. Several of my friends have been inspirational in their routines of working out and eating healthy. It is very inspiring. I’m talking real in person best friends, to coworkers, to old friends that have moved away, to you all…. my twitter/facebook/tumblr people. It is amazing. I just hope that you’re doing it for you, for your health, and not for the pat on the back. There is one person whom I love and think is so wonderful, but they are doing that. Faking it and not ‘til they make it, but…. just faking it. They are cheating themselves and that is the tragedy. I do not think that they see it. Maybe they will read this and realize it is them I am speaking about. I’m not being mean, just real. I don’t think anyone else in your life is being real. Ever. Just saying.
And finally - as for my heart. It’s healing quite well. I find with each experience I learn a valuable lesson. This one is one I will hold forever in so many ways.
Always remember: you cannot force change, honesty, and love.
I’m back on the road to being ‘me’ and for the first time in a good month or two, it feels nice.
xoxo,
D.
'Photo A Day' Project on Facebook.com/DustinHames - Check it out!
After two of my favorite people did this I decided to join in on the fun. A photo each day of my life. Something important in that day gets posted. You get to see my life through photos. Enjoy.
